nicholas cage is the worst part two

gone in 60 seconds is a movie about a balding car thief who is the worst. also he has severe butt rott.

this loser has to steal 50 cars in one night or else everyone will find out what a loser he is ... unfortunately, everyone already knows. so the whole plot is useless. ya, so he steals a bunch of cars, which, if you have A MASTER KEY is not very difficult. i dont know whats so impressive probably that he is doing it while also acting so badly. that must be hard.

then he steals 49 cars which is actually possible for one person to do in one night. and he does it with ease, which makes complete sense.

then for the 50th car he decides to steal the hardest car to steal. he does this because he is an idiot. he could clearly steal another 20 easy cars that he has THE MASTER KEY for and then steal the crown jewel later. but seriously he is such a bozo that he tries this and does it somehow. my theory is the owner saw that such a huge loser was touching his car so he just went and bought like 5 more and let him have it. anyways then he gets in traffic because he is a loser. then he jumps over like 1000000 cars and like gets his wife or daughter or hair or whatever he wanted back. thats the end. of the visible diarrhea.

i saw this because i thought it was going to be about nicholas cage for 60 seconds then he would leave and be gone. gone in 60 seconds for a million years. i was so pumped. like that movie where they kill steven seagall in like the first ten minutes.

someone needs to make a movie where nicholas cage gets killed in it, then while filming actually kill him. or at least steal him and leave him on one of the two islands he used to own before he went bankrupt.